The Educator’s Role in Supporting Independence
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[00:00:00] Hello and welcome to this week's podcast. It is the final installment in the breaking down of slow pedagogy, but will probably not be the last time we touch on this particular topic this year. I hope you've really enjoyed this series. It has been really interesting to uh, delve into it and to really break down these parts and pieces.
If you happen to attend, if you happen to have attended this week's um, seasonal planning, you will have had an even greater introduction to slow pedagogy and really got the nuts and bolts of how to implement that into your week. So if you missed that seasonal attendance, uh, sorry, the seasonal planning session, I do run four of these.
every year, uh, and they are usually two weeks [00:01:00] before the beginning of the next season. So keep your eyes peeled on social media, uh, and the podcast because I will always be telling you when the next ones are happening. So you can make sure you jump on and join because it's really slow. Pedagogy cannot be implemented until the educator understands it first and foremost, which is a given, but also knows how to apply it into their own setting.
And it comes from you being organized first. So we are going to be talking today about your role in independence and supporting independence for children. So this is a topic very, very close to my heart and one that I definitely, Advocate for with children, because if we want to talk about school readiness, this is exactly what it is.
It is the ability to be able to manage [00:02:00] one's own emotions and be responsible for their belongings and be able to communicate and express themselves. They are the foundations for school readiness. And if we don't have those in place, nothing else will flow easily. So it's a really important topic and I am excited to talk to you about it this week.
Let's get into it.
Hello, hello and welcome to the Big Hearted Podcast. My name is Victoria Edmond and I am your host. Our aim here at the Big Hearted Podcast is to nurture a community of heart centered educators to change the perception and delivery of early childhood education and care in Australia and ultimately around the world.
We want you to be inspired by our guests and the topics we bring to you to think of new ways of being as an educator. We want you to feel a sense of belonging via this podcast so that you can engage any time of [00:03:00] the day or night in any place that suits you. We want you to become an educator that delivers education from the heart as we believe this is how we create great change within our world.
So join us as we discover new ways to inspire each other here. On the big hearted podcast
And of course, of course, I start to record a podcast and the neighbor decides to mow their lawn. I'm not even at home and this stuff still happens, so if you hear anything along the way today, I do apologize. Uh, I thought Sunday morning, we'd be safe, but obviously not. Anyway, I want to get into today's topic, which is educators supporting independence for children.
Because when we Uh, assist children to become independent. We absolutely empower them. And when children feel [00:04:00] empowered, they take on challenges. They build their confidence and they get along better in life. They, they seem to have a lot more resilience. They seem to be able to negotiate with their peers a lot better.
They manage their feelings a lot better and they're just generally happier human beings. Who likes to feel helpless? That brings on a whole host of other feelings and situations that can be confronting for people when they feel helpless or powerless. So that has so many broad impacts on people's lives when they feel helpless.
That sometimes The idea of helping someone to feel independent, especially a child, can be a little bit foreign. We are so much [00:05:00] in a time of life where we want things done really quickly. Like, we don't want to wait. We don't want to pause and take a breath. And we are in a rush to get from here to there to here to there.
We don't take time to appreciate things anymore. Like, it's almost an act of rebellion to slow down. I know I get caught up in the busyness of things and the having to do things and get things done. Like I am the worst person for that, but it takes conscious effort to continually slow myself down to go, do you know what?
I actually do need to rest and I'm going to rest and to, to pay attention to those things. You can't do that if you are feeling powerless. [00:06:00] So when we support independence for children, we actually are gifting them a lifetime of being able to problem solve for themselves, to be able to think critically, to be able to be empowered in their life so that they can make change.
How many times have we seen or had a friend or a family member who has been complacent in their life and been a victim and yet not done anything to change things for themselves. So when we foster this approach to independence for children We empower them in so many different ways and aspects in their life.
So what we need to to be aware of first and foremost is that the children aren't the problem. [00:07:00] It's us. It's the adults in their lives that are the problem and I get it. The the primary caregiver needs to get out the door because they have to get to work and It's a rush in the morning. There may be multiple children, siblings that need to get going and the minute you're late and running behind guaranteed one of your children is going to dawdle.
And so it's easier to do things for the children than to let them do things for themselves. And again, I would suggest that there are so many distractions happening in the morning. Maybe there's computer games, there's TV, there's children on devices, all trying to get children off devices to get themselves ready in the morning would be a recipe for disaster [00:08:00] in my eyes.
Having children watching television in the morning when you are asking them to do things. It's never going to happen. I remember being a kid and having to have an alarm set. I was a latchkey kid, so we had a watch, had our key on a chain around our neck. So we could get in the house in the afternoon, but dad had to leave at like 6 or 6.
30 in the morning And I had to be at the bus stop by 7. 30 in the morning And so he would have made my lunch or when I was old enough I would be responsible for making my lunch And then, that's all I had to do, so I'd sit and watch telly, and there would be times, if I didn't have the alarm on my watch, that I was so sucked into watching Agro's Cartoon Connection, Boris Breakfast Club, do you remember those?
Um, watching those, that I could have sat there all morning, until they finished, and then been like, Oh, I've missed the bus. So, the level of [00:09:00] distraction is nowhere near what it is now, back then. The level of distraction was nowhere near. Uh, not only that, but children wouldn't be left at home. I mean, I was in primary school, but children nowadays wouldn't be left at home to get themselves off to school.
Like, times have absolutely changed. Uh, I saw an article the other day where a, a That woman in America, I think Georgia, had let her son walk down to the corner store. He was 10 or 11, let him walk down and she got arrested for that. Children are not allowed now to do things. We don't trust the children. We don't trust the children.
So we have to swing this back the other way because if we don't trust the children, they are never going to trust themselves. Imagine being an adult who grows up not trusting that they can do things and they can manage in life. Like what are we [00:10:00] doing? Honestly, like what are we doing? We do not allow children to play unsupervised under the helicopter anymore.
And it happens in early childhood education too. And I understand the need for supervision when you're dealing with other people's children and preventable things are happening. Like there needs to be accountability in that. However, supervision is sight and or sound. So you might be around the corner.
digging in the garden doing something with two children and two other children are playing in the sandpit around the corner. Your hearing is going to be elevated, you'll be listening that you can hear those children. You can guess what they're doing by the play and what the conversations that they're having.
That's okay, you're within sight [00:11:00] and sound. You may position yourself in a little bit of a different spot so you can kind of see everybody at the same time, but you're also doing something else and that's okay. Children need to be trusted. Children absolutely are capable and competent at life. We wouldn't have survived this long as a species if we weren't capable.
And so we have to trust that the children can play without us hovering over the top of them. It's essential. In fact, I used to put little cubby houses up so the children could go in there and I couldn't see them. And they couldn't see me. There's nothing they can get into in my yard that they're going to injure themselves on or hurt themselves on.
Anytime there's any kind of injury in my yard, it's because they've [00:12:00] fallen over. They've fallen off something, but these are all natural parts of childhood, and we should not be wrapping them up in cotton wool, so they never experience any kind of disruption in their life whatsoever. This is causing huge problems when children get into bigger environments, like a school system, where their teacher has an expectation that they're going to be at a certain point so they can then begin teaching them things.
So this is the critical role in early childhood education that we need to be extremely convicted. Or extremely strong in our convictions around ensuring that children's emotional and social well being is at a point where they can manage their own feelings enough [00:13:00] to be able to get through a whole day.
Now these are practiced. You're not going to have a two year old that never gets upset during the day at things. Three year olds are still going to be expressing big feelings and emotions. By four, they're starting to get the gist of it. By five, they really should have it, and then they're ready to go to school.
So this is where, when we can empower the children and trust that they are competent and capable learners across the board, we then step back enough to give them the opportunities to practice these things. So this is where it comes to you picking yourself up and realize that you're the facilitator, not the director.
So you know the difference in offering just enough support, but not too much. Right? [00:14:00] So this is really important. It's so vital that you understand that you don't take over and take control of these situations for the children. We have to give the children opportunities to process what's going on.
Consider and look at all the tools that they've got in their tool belt. and decide which is the one they want to use and then put that into practice and place with their with their peers. Now it's interesting I did, I had a friend talk to me about some work, I think it's Alison Armstrong, I could have that name wrong, I haven't looked at it myself, but she was telling me A lot of issues happen between men and women because women think and can process so much quicker than what men can.
Now in the Essential Elements I do talk about this. I talk about the brain cortex. The cortex between the two [00:15:00] different hemispheres of the brain is thicker in men than it is in women. So literally it takes longer for thoughts and processes and ideas and, and neural pathways. It takes longer to get from one side to the other of the brain.
It's like watching a tennis match with a tennis ball or a balloon. And I'm not being derogatory, but it's a, it's a, it's a biological fact that women think differently to men. We all know that. Women are a lot quicker at coming to processes, like going through the process and getting to the other side and getting to the answer than what men are.
So when we're talking with men, I don't know about you, but my husband is for sure typical male, drives me nuts sometimes. But, I will be having a conversation with him and I get frustrated that it takes him time to [00:16:00] think. I get frustrated and even realize that's what he's doing, but he's processing his thoughts and I'm already ready to move on to the next thing.
And so I can quite often unconsciously shut him down because I haven't given him enough time and space. So, he then will say, I'm like a bull at a gate, and I just think of everything, I know what to say, and I never give him a chance. And I'm like, what are you talking about? We had an hour long conversation, and you didn't come up with anything in that conversation.
And he goes, yeah, because, and I'm like, I let you speak. And then I talk over the top of him, and I don't really let him speak. But really what we need to learn to do is to pause and allow these silences. Because in that silence, and it's the same with children, in that silence, they need time to get to the end of their thought process.
They also then need to turn around and at the end of that thought [00:17:00] process decide which is the best course of action that they want to take, or look at all the different options that are available to them and decide which one it is that they want to use. Then they've got to put that thought process into action.
It's into words and then say it. And so it's the same with children. They are practicing because it comes easy to us as adults or easier to us as adults when something happens, the process of thinking all the scenarios and coming to a conclusion happens almost instantaneously, especially for women. So, when these things happen instantaneously, we can get frustrated and if we're already stressed and already have, you know, uh, in that state of, uh, for the day, because we may be not be organized, we may have had a rough morning with our own children, uh, maybe we [00:18:00] didn't sleep well, maybe we slept in, we're a little bit behind the eight ball already, like all of these things are normal.
But what they do is if we don't take that minute to take a breath and center ourselves, we bring that through the rest of the day with us. When we bring that unconscious stress through the rest of the day with us, it attaches itself to every single interaction that we have. If we're feeling stressed and, you know, like under the pump somewhat, are you going to sit there and peacefully allow a two or three year old?
To express the emotions that they're feeling, move through that process, and then be able to come to rational thought again? No, you're just gonna go, oh, let me do it for you. And what we're doing in that moment is we are disempowering the children. What we are telling them unconsciously is that we don't trust them to make the right decisions.
They aren't smart enough to come up with the right decisions, [00:19:00] and nor are they smart enough or allowed to make mistakes. Imagine what that does to a person's spiritual being, and what patterns of behavior that will then cause that person to have for the rest of their life. Working with children is no easy feat, because what it requires you to do is to be responsible for your own actions and the space that you hold, which means being aware when you are in your own cycles and patterns.
It's constantly picking yourself up. And being aware and going, Oh, here we are again. I'm doing things for the children and I really shouldn't be. I actually need to allow more time and space in the [00:20:00] day for the children to do these things on their own. So, it's really important that we consider how much we try and pack into a day.
When knowing that we're trying to allow enough time and space for children to do things on their own. Now, there are going to be caveats to that. Sometimes that trip up to the bus stop in the afternoon, because it's a tight squeeze from when they wake up to getting nappies done, toileting, packing beds away, getting shoes and socks on, getting out the door on time so that you can be there for the after school care children.
Those things are sometimes a little bit tricky to manage. That is the only exception where you might say, I know you are practicing putting your shoes and socks on yourself, but we need to leave in 10 minutes and I'm going to help you do that just now. What we can do though, when we [00:21:00] get back, we can take your shoes and socks off and you can do it again yourself.
So they are understanding of these things, right? So, This is why I really advocate for one intentional teaching moment every day. Just one. Just one space where you work on your goals that you have with that child. The rest of the day is devoted to transitions, food, like transition, and transitions aren't just go and wash your hands.
A transition is telling a child, and little Fi, Um, she does the music with children. She runs a wonderful program that you can jump in on. Uh, she runs it via Zoom every morning. Uh, she talks about singing into the child's golden bubble. So when they get activated in play, they put this little, they're like in this little bubble.
Right? And sometimes you can say things to them and it just [00:22:00] doesn't enter into what they're doing because they're so focused on what they are doing that these outside noises don't even make it in there. So she uses singing as a way to get into that golden bubble to then let that child know that soon it will be time to stop what they're doing.
It will be morning tea time soon. So that's the beginning of a transition to get to morning tea. There are so many other steps that need to go in between there. There may be, we're going to be packing away soon. Okay, it's time to start packing away. And then we transition into packing away. Then we need to transition from packing away to going to washing our hands.
Then we transition to washing our hands. Because there may be two or three other children in front of them and they have to wait. So that's a transition to go from the idea to the actual action and then they go from washing their hands to sitting at the table [00:23:00] and then they have morning tea. So a transition is a huge time, piece of time, where you go from one thing to another.
And this is what I talk about in the Essential Elements is the in breathing and the out breathing. So these are all parts of the process that we need to capitalize on every day and keep these transitions smooth. So transitioning like from inside to outside play is the same thing. You need to transition from what you're doing from the outside to getting ready to come inside.
to then coming inside, to then transition to be ready to play inside and to do something inside. So transitions aren't just going from one thing to another. There's steps and there's things that happen in between that give the children cues as to what's happening. If we rush these, [00:24:00] and think of it like just picking up a baby out of the high chair and putting it in another space.
That little baby is most likely going to be a little bit stunned at that process. Whereas if you gently pick them up and you say, I'm going to get ready to move you over to the mat in the sun now. I'm going to take your, um, the high chair straps off. We'll pick you up and we'll wipe your hands and face.
And then we're going to come and look outside. Oh, look at the birds and the trees out here. Isn't it lovely? I thought you'd really like to sit outside here today. I'm going to put you on the mat now. What you're doing is you're giving them space and time to be prepared and ready. And it's the same thing with the children.
So when we pack our day with so much stuff, we are the director and not the facilitator. So a facilitator will offer an idea or a suggestion, but isn't attached to the [00:25:00] outcome of that. And so we need to really be aware that when we are putting so many things on our program, that we are taking away the opportunity for children to practice all of the things that they need to practice, which will help them become independent.
Because when we're directing it, there can be no independence within that. So, The other thing, too, to be aware of is when we're directing, we aren't asking questions. When we're directing, we're just telling what to do, where to go. You may think that it's being child led, but it's absolutely not. So when you facilitate, facilitation of something is holding a space.
And watching what happens within that space. [00:26:00] Making adjustments as you go. But never putting finite answers on things. So instead of giving solutions to children, you can ask things like, well what do you think you could try next? What do you think would fit in there? What do you think we would need to take?
Because what we're doing in those moments is we're giving the children opportunity to come up with ideas themselves. Now at first those ideas are probably going to be wild, like, we need to pack dragons. Well, there's always place for dragons as far as I'm concerned, right? If you've read The Fourth Wing, you'll agree.
I want, I want a, a, a dragon too. Um, so, but these things are totally age appropriate and depending on that child's development, their mental and emotional state and their [00:27:00] spiritual state, totally, totally normal. If we are giving the solutions instead of asking the questions, we are again taking away that opportunity for that child to learn critical thinking skills.
And we are not helping them to be independent. So asking those questions, what do you think you could try next, is giving them an opportunity and then give them the space to think of the things. Put it into thought process and answer you. That could take upwards of a minute. Some children will spit the ideas out in a torrent, which is probably the child I was, as you could imagine.
But then there are other children that that like to weigh things up and consider things. And we need to be allowing all the children all of the space. . [00:28:00] Okay. So what we do then is that we are creating that environment that supports problem solving, the open-ended resources, the risk friendly play spaces, and opportunities for the child-led learning all naturally come when we trust that the children are capable and competent learners when we are facilitating and not directing.
When we're encouraging these ideas of reflection, well, what do you think you could try next? All lead into that process of the child being able to be a problem solver. Now, it requires a huge amount of time. And it's not just something that happens overnight. You are going to have to pick yourself up time and time and time again and say, Ah!
I'm controlling this. Uh, I'm giving solutions. I'm not [00:29:00] allowing them the space to come up with these ideas themselves. So for you, the work is professional and it's not that you're not doing anything. And this again, it all ties into this idea of doing too much and packing too much in a day as a way to Justify what we do, so that we can say, Oh, I'm a great educator.
I'm a great educator because I've done Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah with the children. And what we did is we lost the ability to really look at what we do professionally and to trust the children are capable and confident learners. We got really busy and we got really distracted in our own lives, which meant that we were feeling behind the eight ball already.
And what we [00:30:00] need to do, and this is what this year's summit is going to be all about, is swinging the pendulum back. Swinging the pendulum back to a time where educators were able to educate and they did it in a gentle manner. They did it without. hammering the children without being helicopters and the queue to helicopter to hands off is about to come to you too because this year before or sorry this season before I open the essential elements we I do the free course helicopter to hands off so every time I open essential elements, I have, um, a different workshop webinar series that I opened for you.
Um, so this time it is Helicopter to Hands Off. And I'm really excited because as the name suggests, it's [00:31:00] Helicopter to Hands Off. So, so it's super exciting and I can't wait to bring it for you. And, um, yeah, it's, it's going to be great because it's talking about this, giving practical solutions, ideas, and all the things that you may need.
To, um, to use in your day-to-day practice. So that will be coming to you on the 4th of March, and you will need to register for that. You can do so at bighearted education.com/helicopter two dash hands off. Again, that will be in the show notes for you. Uh, so. It gives you skills, it tells you how, how you are going to be able to implement these things in your own practice and it's so hands on, which is funny because it's hands off, helicopter to hands off.
But [00:32:00] it's hands on, you can apply this stuff directly into your practice from the minute you learn it. But it does require you to really understand that the, the, the. benefits of your work are in you doing less and allowing the children to do more. So I, I just really want to get this really clear. There is a big difference in justifying what you do, because you're not sure about exactly what it is that you do, so you do more stuff as a way to try to disguise the fact that you actually don't 100 percent know what you're doing.
To an educator. who is confident that the children are capable learners and allows enough space for the children to demonstrate that and her professional work comes in in the observation of that and [00:33:00] seeing how the group dynamics work and really observing each individual child in the work that they do.
And then building them up from those places and continually just facilitating an environment where they can practice the skills of being emotionally resilient. Learning how to deal with their emotions and holding themselves. Learning how to communicate with their peers and being responsible. Take your shoes off and put them next to your bag.
If you take your hat off, put it where the hats go, either outside or in your bag. Your drink bottle goes on that, on the table over there. If you take your jumper off, it goes back in your bag. And constantly reminding the children of these things, [00:34:00] giving them the time, they may need 10 or 15 minutes, to put their shoes and socks on.
They may need a little bit of help, but they also may need a little bit of space to be frustrated at how that task is not easy. Because once they get it, And they're able to put their socks on for themselves. The sense of achievement that they have inside themselves is so much greater than the frustration they experience until they can, until they can do it.
But they're never going to get there if you do everything for them. Because you're rushed. You're pressured. You're feeling pressure. And you're feeling pressure. because you don't 100 percent know what you're doing. I hope that makes sense. And I hope that you go, yeah, that's exactly how I feel. But now I [00:35:00] don't know how to get out of that.
Well, seasonal planning is just the best way to start that process. That seasonal planning, it tell, like I had, I ran the session yesterday and there were educators that were like, But if I do this, then I, I, like, I, I, I'm not doing enough and it's like, well, you are doing enough. You're doing enough by holding the space for the children.
You've provided, you've done what the government requires you to do. You've provided some intentional teaching. You've provided those moments of intentional teaching. It's only 10 or 15 minutes in the day. But that is enough. That is more than enough because the rest of the day is devoted to eating, sleeping, those beautiful transitions, and then that creative play process for the children, that practice for the children.
And this is where you then observe and you start to go, Oh, I think that child's going to need a [00:36:00] little bit of practice on. I'm noticing they may have a little bit of low muscle tone, or they fall over a lot. So I really want to look at their core muscles and do some things that will help them strengthen their core muscles.
I'm going to put some heavy tires around and see if I can encourage them to do some heavy lifting to use their body. And then that's it. And then you watch. And you keep providing these opportunities to help that child with their core strength. Maybe you might do some skipping or bits and pieces along the way that you can just add in that they're going to be able to do these things and then pretty soon they're gonna have a lot stronger core and they'll stop falling over.
They'll be able to sit on a chair without wriggling and squiggling and all these kinds of things. These are things that naturally come into our day. They're done in a way that the children don't realize what's actually happening. It just becomes a [00:37:00] part of what they do. And that can only be noticed and then acted on when you are not so busy and stressed and feeling pressure because you've already got your plan.
When you've already got your plan in place, you don't have to worry. You just follow the plan. And it's easy and it's simple. And there isn't the pressure. And when you don't have the pressure, the children don't have the pressure. People can't learn in pressurized situations. It's just, it just doesn't work.
So I hope that gives you some, uh, food to, for thought. Uh, things to think about. And, uh, Yeah, I'm really excited to be able to give you the next step in the process, which is Helicopter to Hands Off, which is celebrating the launch of Essential Elements. And, uh, yeah, it's, it's going to be so exciting. I'm really excited to welcome in the next cohort of [00:38:00] educators into our incredible community.
We had a fantastic Q& A session last week, uh, where we covered so much ground around the need for responsibility. And one educator was able to share. Her story of what has happened for her, and there was a tremendous amount of learning that came out of that for everybody on the session. So, we're going into the next Masterclass, not this Thursday coming, but next Thursday, and that one is going to be all around.
How to ethically provide resources that are ethical to the environment and like pocket friendly for you but giving educators tangible things to be able to do with the children that are covering so many different bases and just like the environment. Bye. a pocket full of resources basically for the educators in the essential elements.
So that if you find yourself going, I don't [00:39:00] know what to do. You've got some solutions and some, some ideas there for you. So that is this, uh, coming up this upcoming masterclass, and I'm very excited. So if you want to make sure that you don't miss out on joining the essential elements. You can jump on the waitlist now, uh, and you can do so by going to the website www.
bigheartededucation. com and then you will go to the courses tab and select the essential elements. It will take you to the waitlist and you can read a little bit more about the essential elements there. So, yeah, that brings us to the end of today's session. Thank you all. Thank you so much for listening and, uh, I hope you got a lot out of this breakdown of slow pedagogy.
As I said, it won't be the last time we touch on it this year. This whole year is devoted to looking at slow pedagogy, but I hope you now have a bit more of [00:40:00] an understanding. As to what slow pedagogy or how slow pedagogy can look in your family daycare service. Until next week, my friendly friends, thank you so much.
Go forth and have a magical week. And I look forward to talking with you soon. Big love!
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